The Struggle That Men Can’t Talk About – Depression

A guest insight from Mark Ramsay, Registered Counselling Therapist – Candidate (RCT-C)

Have you ever listened to a talk that left you feeling profoundly moved, almost as if it had peeled back layers of your own experiences? That’s exactly what happened to me recently. I stumbled upon a talk that delved into a subject we don’t often discuss – the burdens of shame and depression that many men carry silently.

Men’s depression is a topic that rarely gets the attention it deserves. Many men feel they can’t talk about their struggles, often bottling up their feelings until they become an unbearable weight. The talk highlighted how men go through life carrying and unintentionally passing on their burdens. This isn’t because they want to; often, they don’t even realize they’re doing it.

The reality is, while societal expectations often limit women’s opportunities, they also rob men of something equally crucial – their capacity for authenticity. Society has long conditioned men to seek self esteem through performance, whether that’s in their careers, sports, or even relationships and social status. This constant need to prove oneself can lead to a distressing cycle of hurt, shame and substance addiction, all in an effort to soothe their bruised pride.

What struck me most about this talk was how beautifully it captured the essence of men’s shame and its destructive manifestations. The speaker, Terry, has a remarkable understanding of these issues and communicates them with such clarity and compassion. It’s rare to find someone who can articulate these struggles in a way that resonates so deeply.

If you are a man who has ever felt the weight of depression or if you love someone who has, I can’t recommend this talk enough. It’s an eye-opener, a conversation starter, and most importantly, a reminder that you’re not alone. By breaking the silence and speaking openly about these issues, we can begin to dismantle the harmful narratives that keep so many men from seeking the help and support they need.

Here is the talk

In a world where men are often expected to be stoic and self-reliant, acknowledging vulnerability is a radical act of courage. We should know that we can and should talk about depression. So, let’s start talking, listening, and supporting each other. After all, true strength lies in our ability to be authentic, to embrace our full range of emotions, and to seek connection rather than isolation.

Counselling / therapy can be a valuable place for men to begin the process of talking about these kinds of experiences. If you’d like to schedule a session with a therapist, please reach out to us and let us know.

Mark Ramsay is a Registered Counselling Therapist – Candidate at Crossroads Counselling & Psychological Services. Set up an appointment with Mark Ramsay.