Starting Counselling – What Should I Expect in My First Therapy Session?
Starting Counselling or Therapy for the First Time

Thinking about starting mental health therapy or counselling, but not sure what to expect? You’re not alone. Many people feel nervous before their first session. That’s totally normal. The unknown can feel intimidating—but taking this first step is a big act of self-care.

What Happens in the First Therapy Session?

In your first therapy session, the goal is for your therapist to get to know you. Most sessions start with a quick review of the consent and confidentiality forms you signed when booking.

After that, your therapist will ask questions to better understand:

• Why you’re seeking therapy or counselling
• What your goals are
• A bit about your background and current challenges

It’s a conversation—not an interrogation. There’s no pressure to “get it right.” Your therapist will help guide the process.

Do I Need to Prepare?

No. You don’t need to bring anything or do anything special to prepare. Just come as you are.

That said, it can help to:

• Think about what’s been bothering you
• Be open and honest about your feelings
• Consider what you might want to get out of therapy

But it’s also okay if you’re unsure. Many people don’t know exactly what they need at first. That’s something you and your therapist can explore together.

What If I Feel Nervous?

Feeling nervous is normal. Starting counselling means opening up—and that takes courage. Just know your therapist is trained to support you through this process. You’re not expected to have all the answers.

Final Thoughts

Counselling and therapy are personal journeys. Everyone’s experience is different. What matters most is that you show up. Your therapist will meet you where you are and help you take the next step toward healing, growth, and change.

Julia Slaunwhite, M.A., has proven to be an effective counsellor, bringing empathy, understanding, and a wealth of knowledge to her approach. Her training and experience allow her to connect with individuals on a meaningful level, tailoring her therapeutic techniques to meet the unique needs of those she serves. Julia works with individuals and couples. She is currently accepting new clients.

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Ready to Start Therapy?
Booking your first counselling session is a brave step—and we’re here to support you. Contact us today. 

Couples therapy isn’t just for crisis—it’s for any couple who wants to improve communication, rebuild trust, or feel more connected. Many couples come to therapy feeling stuck. Maybe you’re having the same argument over and over. Maybe things just feel “off,” and you can’t explain why.

You might be avoiding each other, walking on eggshells, or feeling more like roommates than partners. Some couples are healing from betrayal. Others are struggling with parenting, finances, or in-laws. Whatever the challenge, couples therapy offers tools and support to move forward—together.

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Why Couples Counselling Works

A common pattern I see in relationships is the pursuer–withdrawer dynamic. One partner wants to talk and connect. The other pulls away to avoid conflict. The more one pushes, the more the other retreats. Both feel hurt, misunderstood, and alone.

This cycle creates emotional distance—but it can be broken. Couples counselling helps each partner understand their role in the pattern and begin to change it. Watch this short video to see this dynamic explained clearly and compassionately.

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The Heart of Couples Therapy

Everyone wants to feel loved, safe, and valued. But past experiences, fear of rejection, or old habits can block those needs. Couples therapy gently uncovers what’s really going on beneath the surface.

I use two proven approaches:

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): Focuses on emotional safety, vulnerability, and connection.
• The Gottman Method: Offers practical tools to improve communication and reduce conflict.

Together, these methods help couples grow—not just manage conflict, but heal and reconnect.

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What You’ll Learn in Couples Counselling

• How to break the cycle of conflict
• How to truly listen and feel heard
• How to repair after arguments
• How to build a stronger friendship
• How to reconnect emotionally and physically

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Is Couples Therapy for You?

If you feel distant, misunderstood, or stuck in the same argument, couples therapy can help. You don’t need to wait until things are “bad enough.” Taking the first step shows strength, not failure.

Let’s work together to rebuild your connection with empathy, trust, and clarity.

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Book Your Couples Therapy Session Today

If you’re ready to create change, I’d be honoured to support you.
👉 Click here to learn more or schedule a session

Sydney Walker, RCT-C, is a Crossroads associate who holds a B.A. in Psychology and a Master’s in Counselling Psychology from Yorkville University. She supports individuals 16+ dealing with anxiety, depression, stress, relationships, and body image concerns. Sydney is also passionate about helping couples. She has advanced training in the Gottman Method (Levels 1 & 2)—an evidence-based approach for building stronger relationships.

Want to learn more or book a session with Sydney?
Contact us today.

Stress-Reducing Conversations: A Daily Practice for Stronger Relationships

Couples often come to therapy feeling overwhelmed. Each partner may carry their own stress. This can spill into the relationship. It’s natural to want to help. But sometimes, even well-meaning advice can do harm.

Phrases like “Have you tried this?” or “But what about…?” often come from care. Still, they can leave your partner feeling dismissed. When advice replaces empathy, your partner may feel unseen. Their emotions can be overlooked in favor of problem-solving.

This is where stress-reducing conversations make a difference.

Why Stress-Reducing Conversations Matter

When someone’s emotions are dismissed, their emotional brain takes over. That’s why your partner might get upset, even if you’re trying to help. Their brain is protecting them. In that state, they can’t hear advice. They need to feel safe first.

When you validate feelings, the emotional brain calms down. Then the logical brain can re-engage. Only then are they ready to think clearly and solve problems.

What Is a Stress-Reducing Conversation?

Stress-reducing conversations come from the Gottman Method. They are designed to help couples connect emotionally. These talks are not about solving problems. They are about listening and supporting each other.

When practiced regularly, stress-reducing conversations build:

• Trust
• Empathy
• Emotional safety

This helps couples face stress together—without shutting each other down.

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How to Practice Stress-Reducing Conversations

The Speaker’s Role

Talk about something stressful outside the relationship. Be honest. Share your emotions fully. The goal is to help your partner understand your stress—not to filter or edit.

The Listener’s Role

Your job is to listen, not to fix.

Here’s how:

• Listen actively. Put distractions away. Nod, say “I get that,” or “Tell me more.”
• Ask open-ended questions. Try “What was that like for you?” or “How did that feel?”
• Avoid jumping into solutions. Problem-solving too soon can feel dismissive.
• Show empathy. Say things like “I’d be upset too” or “That sounds so hard.”
• Check in. Ask, “Do you feel understood?” or “What do you need right now?”
• Take their side. Even if you see things differently, validate their feelings. Avoid defending others in the story.
• Offer comfort. A hug or kind gesture can show your support without words.

Remember the motto:
Understand before giving advice.

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Make It a Habit

When couples practice stress-reducing conversations regularly, their connection grows. Communication becomes stronger. Emotional intimacy deepens. Most importantly, both partners feel seen and supported.

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Sydney Walker, RCT-C, is a Crossroads associate who holds a B.A. in Psychology and a Master’s in Counselling Psychology from Yorkville University. She supports individuals 16+ dealing with anxiety, depression, stress, relationships, and body image concerns. Sydney is also passionate about helping couples. She has advanced training in the Gottman Method (Levels 1 & 2)—an evidence-based approach for building stronger relationships.

Want to learn more or book a session with Sydney?
Contact us today.

Come in. Relax. Get comfortable.

That might not be the first feeling you expect when you walk into a commercial building—but at Crossroads Counselling & Psychological Services, it’s exactly the experience we aim to create.

When you visit us, it’s not just another appointment on your calendar. It’s a moment to step away from the noise, and step toward peace of mind.

That kind of work doesn’t happen by accident. It requires intention—especially in how a space looks, feels, and functions. In other words: thoughtful design.

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Why Design Matters in Mental Health

A growing amount of research (The Impact of Design on Mental Health; Designing for Wellbeing: The Role of Interior Architecture in Mental Health) shows a powerful connection between our environment and our mental well-being. A common prescription is spending time in nature because of its proven benefits. But indoor spaces matter in different ways, given how much of our time is spent indoors. The way a room is designed can impact how we feel—sometimes in ways we don’t even realize. 

With that in mind, the design of our new home at 128 Appaloosa Run was no afterthought—it was an extension of our therapeutic mission.

Outside of my work as a psychologist, I’ve always loved interior design. Maybe it’s my creative right brain at work—or maybe it’s my belief that the spaces we inhabit help shape our emotions. Either way, I leaned into this passion while designing Crossroads’ new space. I drew inspiration from nature, my favourite places, and the knowledge that healing starts with how a space makes you feel.

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Intentional Choices for a Better Experience

Designed for Visual Appeal
Lighting sets the tone. We chose warm, unique fixtures to create a welcoming, calming atmosphere—visually signalling that this is not just another office, but a place designed for mental wellness.

Colour plays its part too. Inspired by nature, our palette evokes the outdoors: deep forest greens and calming ocean blues—colours that ground us and bring a sense of calm. These are personal to me; few things are more centring than being surrounded by evergreens or standing beside the sea.

Texture adds another layer of warmth. We added custom trim and moulding to show attention to detail—because just like our clients, the space is anything but generic.

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Designed for Everyone
Accessibility isn’t optional—it’s foundational. From the parking lot to each therapy room, our space is fully accessible for those with mobility needs. Everyone deserves to feel seen, valued, and welcomed from the moment they arrive.

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Designed for Confidentiality
We took confidentiality seriously during renovations. Every soundproofing option our contractors offered—we said yes. Offices feature solid-core, cork-filled doors with sound strips, insulation, resilient sound channels, 5/8″ drywall, and SonoPan on all walls. The office features a white noise machine. The result: a space where your privacy is protected, and outside noise fades away.

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Designed for Convenience

Our location strikes a balance: close to major roads but tucked away from the busiest streets. That means easy access and a smooth arrival—plus nearby amenities like coffee shops and grocery stores.

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Designed for People
Each therapy room is tailored for specific needs: some for kids, others for couples or families, and some for quiet one-on-one work. Each is thoughtfully appointed to feel personal, welcoming, and calming.

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The Bottom Line
Therapy is deeply personal. It’s hard work. The environment shouldn’t make it harder—it should make it easier. When you walk into Crossroads, we want you to feel safe. At home. Appreciated. And ready.

Because when a space is designed with care, it doesn’t just hold your story—it helps you heal.

Therapy by Design: The Gallery:

Amy Wiens, psychologist, is the founder and Principal of Crossroads Counselling & Psychological Services. She holds an Honours degree in Psychology from Saint Mary’s University and a Master’s degree in Counselling Psychology with a focus in Marriage and Family Therapy from Trinity Western University. With her educational background and passion for helping individuals, couples, and families live more congruent, authentic, and meaningful lives, Amy is dedicated to supporting clients in navigating their personal challenges.

Welcome Back, Sydney! A Familiar Face Joins Us as Our Newest Associate

We’re thrilled to officially welcome Sydney Walker, M.A., to the Crossroads team in her new role as an Associate and Registered Counselling Therapist – Candidate (RCT-C)!

Many of you may already recognize Sydney—she first joined Crossroads as our Administrative Assistant, later stepped into the role of Practicum Student, and now returns as a fully qualified clinician after completing her Master’s in Counselling Psychology from Yorkville University. We’re incredibly proud to see her growth and honoured to have her continue her professional journey with us.

Sydney is already making waves in the field of mental health. She recently co-authored a published academic paper titled Factors related to post-traumatic stress disorder in parents of children with neurodevelopmental disabilities: A systematic review and narrative synthesis. Her dedication to both clinical practice and research speaks to the passion and depth she brings to her work.

In her therapeutic practice, Sydney draws on a variety of evidence-based approaches, including:

• Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT)
• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
• Attachment-Based Therapies
• Mindfulness-Based Practices
• The Gottman Method

This integrative approach allows her to tailor sessions to meet the unique needs of each client, supporting them with care, insight, and professionalism.

Whether you’re looking to improve your emotional well-being, navigate a life transition, or work through relationship challenges, Sydney offers a compassionate, skilled presence to walk alongside you.

Ready to book a session with Sydney?
We’d love to connect you— contact us today to get started.

Welcome Back, Sydney! A Familiar Face Joins Us as Our Newest Associate

One year ago, Crossroads Counselling & Psychological Services proudly moved into our newly renovated building in Hammonds Plains. Today, we’re taking a moment to reflect on this incredible journey and celebrate the growth we’ve experienced along the way. It’s our 1-Year Building Anniversary, and we couldn’t be more grateful!

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Back in April 2024, our team included Amy, two associates, and a practicum student—all working from offices in a local business centre. In November 2023, we purchased a new building and began renovations in January 2024, completing them just in time for our grand opening in May 2024.

Since then, we’ve grown in so many ways. Our team has expanded, our building has come to life with energy and purpose, and—most importantly—we’ve had the privilege of supporting more clients on their mental health journeys.

We want to extend a heartfelt thank you to everyone who has supported us throughout this process. To our team members—past, present, and new—thank you for your dedication. And to our clients: you are the reason we continue striving to make a positive impact on mental health in our community.

Here’s to one amazing year—and to all that’s still to come!

Crossroads’ 1-Year Building Anniversary

How to Stay Grounded in Uncertain Times

Let’s be honest — life feels heavy lately. Maybe you’ve found yourself deep in the daily doomscroll, searching for a sense of control. Whether it’s global conflict, political change, economic instability, climate anxiety, or personal upheaval, it can feel like the world is unraveling. In times like these, it’s important to find grounding perspectives to help you navigate the fear and uncertainty you may be experiencing.

This Isn’t New

Here’s a powerful truth: none of this is new.

Human history is filled with challenge, uncertainty, and change. And yet, throughout time, people have adapted, survived — and even thrived. While we don’t want to minimize what we’re collectively facing today, it’s worth remembering that hardship is not new to humanity.

We’ve endured pandemics like the 1918 Spanish Flu, which infected a third of the global population, and more recently, COVID-19, which shook our already strained healthcare systems and became one of the most significant global health crises of the 21st century. Economically, we’ve weathered the Great Depression in 1929 and the Great Recession in 2008 — both periods of widespread financial instability and struggle.

While the specifics differ, these events tell a familiar story: humans are remarkably resilient. That doesn’t mean we’re immune to fear or stress — but it does mean we come from a legacy of perseverance, resourcefulness, and adaptation.

Feel What You Feel

When the world feels unpredictable, our emotional landscapes shift. You may feel anger, grief, anxiety, helplessness — or perhaps numbness. Rather than judging or suppressing these emotions, try approaching them with curiosity and compassion.

Ask yourself: What’s really coming up for me right now?
Is it fear for your future? Heartbreak for others? A sense of powerlessness? Whatever it is — your emotions are valid.

Acknowledging your feelings is the first step toward deciding how to respond. For some, that might mean joining a cause, donating, talking with someone who can hold space for your experience, or volunteering in a way that restores purpose and agency. Remember, meaningful action doesn’t have to be grand — small steps matter.

Emotions can also point us toward new boundaries we need to set. This might mean limiting difficult conversations with others, changing the subject when topics become overwhelming, or giving yourself permission to disengage. Setting boundaries with yourself is just as important — like taking breaks from the news, recognizing what’s in your control, or intentionally focusing on something that brings you peace or joy.

Your Brain Is Wired for Threat Detection

If you’ve been doomscrolling more than you’d like to admit, know this: you’re not alone — and you’re not broken.

Our brains are wired to scan for danger. It’s a leftover survival mechanism that once helped us avoid predators. Today, it can trap us in a loop of consuming distressing media, reinforcing the belief that the world is constantly unsafe.

News platforms are often designed to keep us engaged — not necessarily to inform, but to capture attention for profit. Social media algorithms work similarly, feeding us more of what we engage with — including negativity and fear-inducing content.

The more we consume this kind of content, the more our brain believes danger is imminent. It gets a hit of validation every time something bad confirms our worries, reinforcing the cycle and keeping our nervous system in a constant state of alert.

Try limiting your news intake to once a day from a few trusted sources. Balance this with stories of hope, kindness, and progress — reminders that good still exists in the world. Your nervous system needs that balance.

You can also use this moment as a learning opportunity. Instead of spiralling into fear, educate yourself more deeply on the issues that matter to you. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) teaches us to evaluate the evidence for and against our thoughts, helping reduce anxiety and cultivate more balanced thinking.

Remember, the more we engage with certain types of media, the more we shape our digital environment — often unknowingly narrowing our perspectives. Broaden your lens by reading books, listening to podcasts, exploring scholarly articles, or having conversations with people who hold different viewpoints. It’s one of the most powerful ways to stay informed and grounded.

Do You Trust Yourself?

Sometimes the scariest part of uncertain times isn’t what’s happening “out there” — it’s what we believe about ourselves.

If you don’t trust your ability to handle hard things, the future will feel terrifying. But what if you could start to rebuild that trust?

Reflect on the story you’re telling yourself. Is it one of fragility or one of quiet strength? Does your inner critic tell you you’ll fall apart when things get tough? That voice might mean well — it wants to prepare you — but in doing so, it can feed your anxiety and erode your sense of inner safety.

Take a moment to remember everything you’ve already survived. The challenges you’ve met. The lessons you’ve learned. The ways you’ve grown. You don’t need to predict every twist and turn to be okay — you just need to believe that you’ll rise to meet them when they come.

This is your invitation to challenge the inner critic and replace it with a quieter, steadier voice that says: I’ve got me.

Final Thoughts

The way we see the world depends on where we choose to look.

Uncertainty doesn’t always mean chaos.
It can also mean possibility, renewal, and hidden strength.

So take a break. Take a breath. Feel what’s real. And turn down the noise.
And above all — return to that deep, inner trust that reminds you:

You are steady.
You are capable.
You are not alone.
You’ve got this.

Carey Best is a Registered Psychologist who is passionate about helping people discover how to help themselves. To book a session with Carey, contact us.

Parents – Connect through reading

Parents – Reading is wonderful opportunity to not only teach your child in many different ways, but to also support a positive relationship and have fun!

The next time you are reading together, try the following:

• Sit face to face so you can easily interact with each other. You can have your child towards you while on your lap, or sitting in front of you facing you.
• Make sure you’re at the same, or very similar, height level. This allows for a lot of eye contact and connection through the story!
• Use animated faces and voices throughout the story to capture their attention and make them smile.
• You can even act out the story and make it highly interactive for the both of you.

Kirsten Spasyouti is a Registered Counselling Therapist – Candidate with experience in supporting parents and children in emotional development and regulation. Kirsten supports children, adolescents and adults with a particular focus in neuro-affirming care. She can be found on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/kirstenspasyouti_rct_c/ where she shares information for individuals across the lifespan. To book a session with Kirsten, contact us.

Connect through reading

The team at Crossroads wishes a warm welcome to our new Admin Assistant, Ana Lorenzon. Ana joins us with a strong background in marketing and program management. As well, she is currently pursuing a Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology degree from Yorkville University. We are pleased to have her on the team! Please join us in welcoming her as you see her. 🙂

Emotion Talk: Why teaching children how to speak about their emotions is important for their overall growth and development.

Talking about emotions with your child from a young age is crucial for their emotional development and overall well-being. As a parent, you have the unique and wonderful opportunity to start integrating this type of language into your day-to-day interactions with your child.

Here are five reasons why teaching kids to express their emotions is important:

1. Helps your child to both understand and label their emotions. This helps them to express themselves better and can reduce frustrations or behavioural outbursts. For example, your child may say, “I feel sad because you said ‘no’ to TV,” rather than reacting with anger. Tip: Use a variety of emotion words to continue to expand their, and your, language (E.g., frustrated, overwhelmed, embarrassed).
2. Promotes Emotional Intelligence. This includes skills like empathy (the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person), self-awareness (understanding the things that make you who you are), and self-regulation (being aware of your thoughts, emotions and behaviors and being able to manage your responses to those). These skills support your child in building healthy relationships and coping with different challenges that they face.
3. Helps your child to build healthy coping mechanisms. When we can recognize and name what we are feeling, we are better able to cope during that experience. For example, if a child can recognize the anxiety they feel before a test, they can make a conscious choice as to how to support themselves through it (E.g., deep breathing). Tip: Model healthy coping mechanisms for your child to normalize the use of different tools.
4. Strengthens relationships: Open communication about emotions can foster a secure and trusting relationship between your child and you. This secure attachment helps children manage their feelings better and develop a sense of security. Fact: The attachment and security they feel with you will show up later in life in different relationships.
5. Supports your child’s academic and social success: Children who manage their emotions well are more likely to do well in school and get along with others. This is because they can focus better, handle stress, and interact positively with their peers. Additionally, the more they feel safe to talk about their emotions, the more likely they are to seek help from others (E.g., teachers) when needed.
   

Kirsten Spasyouti is a Registered Counselling Therapist – Candidate with experience in supporting parents and children in emotional development and regulation. Kirsten supports children, adolescents and adults with a particular focus in neuro-affirming care. She can be found on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/kirstenspasyouti_rct_c/ where she shares information for individuals across the lifespan. To book a session with Kirsten, contact us.

Teaching kids to express their emotions